Many times, we find it very difficult for decision making and more often we regret having made a choice under pressure. Be it in case of a teenager blasting through puberty or a man with a mid-life crisis, we have all been torn between options at some point of time in our lives.
And this becomes so important as most of the time these choices that you make have an everlasting effect on your life, so making sure that you are not getting yourself in a sticky position in decision-making process is just as pivotal as standing by them, once you have made up your mind:
Tips to Make Tough Decisions:
The following mentioned are a few tips on how to make a difficult decision or making effective decisions.
1. Matters that need looking into:
Sometimes making decisions can be quite a tricky task since half of the time a lot many matters are linked together in relation to your problem that you are dealing with. Therefore, prematurely reacting to this kind of situation is never a good idea. Often we see that something which you have overlooked in the past has come up as your worst nightmare leading to a number of problems. In that case what you need to keep in mind is targeting one problem at a time and eradicating them from the root. It is not possible to go in the past and undo something you wish you had not done, but since it is not an option you had, better take up the matter at hand and look into the reasons that are giving rise to the current problems.
2. Considering perspectives:
Since you cannot deliberately jump to conclusions owing to matters involving other people, you would do better to weigh the matter from another’s perspective. Taking into account as to how your decision can influence other people is definitely important on humanitarian grounds. Furthermore, such a drastic measure if gone wrong can completely severe your ties with people important to you. For this, you need to take extra care and speculate on the matter from a lens favourable to the persons involved.
3. Asking your parents:
Involving your parents in any matter is going to make it easy for you since they have the benefit of experience. But simply letting them completely in on the matter expecting them to handle everything just seems too irresponsible and something only a child would do. No grown-up would want to give the matter up to their parents to solve the problems that have been risen because of your own carelessness. Moreover, it is not always possible to open up to them honestly without holding even an iota of the truth back, so it is just sensible to say nothing more than you need them to know and trust their advice.
4. How does it end for you:
You invariably have to ask yourself this question before you hastily move onto taking a decision that might not be best for you. It is one thing to look into the matter with patience and from different angles so as not to disappoint others and another to play a martyr jeopardizing your own interests just because you think that it might not be in somebody else’s best interest. Of course, you are a philanthropist at heart but even that has to come to a halt if what you are about to do is absolutely and undeniably going to take a toll on you. So always view the matter in relation to long term effects as only taking a decision does not sabotage your future prospects.
5. See if it is in your best interest:
Just as it is normal to come across potholes and bumps on the road while driving, it is natural to face various kinds of obstacles while taking important decisions for yourself. Everyone reaches a point in their life when they have to take decisions on their own, making sure that it is in their best interest. There are a number of things one can take notice of so that his/her efforts and sacrifices in making good decisions do not go to waste. For example, it never fares well to hurry or be hurried into effective decision making because most often matters are solved on their own when things after running a natural course fall into place. So in such matters making an untimely move just may prove to be completely useless.
6. Being positive:
It is quite the non-starter if you start worrying about the outcome even before you make a decision. So to avoid the kind of cynicism that can keep you perpetually in conflict with your convictions you have to keep your mind off the negative thoughts that defeat the purpose. Training your mind to look at matters in a positive light makes the brunt of the consequences pertaining to your decision all the more tolerable. Moreover any problem relating to any decision turns up at the very onset of the need to take the decision, so the need to be impervious to any ill effect associated with making a tough decision is essential.
7. Pros and cons:
Before you move along with a decision and later break your head over it, consider all sides of the matter. Making tough decision for yourself is never easy especially when it involves your peace of mind. Therefore it is a vital step to spend some time thinking about the matter by measuring its bright sides as opposed to the negative ones. Furthermore, any tough decision regarding how to proceed in life as to reap the best benefits, in the long run, is never without a few risks. But make absolutely sure that none of what you do backfires because mistakes can radically change the turn of events to the worst as opposed to how you plan them.
8. Do not ask too many people:
Asking too many people for an opinion can only delay the matter not to mention confuse the rational take you may have already had, so do not ask people who are only going to confuse you than actually help you solve it. Asking for advice can be helpful but never from too many people because people may differ in their opinion about a matter which can only complicate things. Go to someone for the advice you trust but remember that at the end of the day you will have to make your decisions or make better choices and no one else will be there with you to face the blow if something goes wrong. So take opinions but not at the expense of what you think you ought to do.
9. Give it a fair amount of thought:
Before you take any difficult decision make sure you have come to terms with as many possibilities you can regarding the matter even if it means spending a couple of days in deep thought. For example, suppose you are making a down payment for something you had your eyes on for a very long time and on the pretext you have had to cut down on your household expenses much to the despair of your folks. Now think for a while in terms your immediate need of the object you are going to buy and if possible save up till you think you can afford to pay for it without having your people to suffer. But do not overthink as it will only keep you from taking a fair decision and will also raise the risk of taking a wrong step. Therefore cut to the chase, as soon as you think you are ready to make a move after having given it a fair amount of thought.
10. Trust yourself:
It is not out of the ordinary to have doubts as to what might happen if you somehow take a wrong decision and ruin whatever chances you hoped you will have if all went as planned. Nonetheless, if you have recently moved out to live alone and not under the shadow of your parents anymore this is probably going to affect you the most. While it will seem quite challenging having to take a big decision all by yourself for the first time in your life, it is definitely not going to take you down unless you decide to give in. The truth is, everyone has to start being on their own at some point of time and the sooner you come to terms with this fact the better chances you will have to cope with it.
11. See how it affects others:
Taking notice of what role your decision might play in somebody else’s life is just as important as caring for your own because there are chances that what might do you good is not always promising for others. Sometimes it happens that what you want and what you ought to do to possess it, have to go through what might not sit well with how others may feel because of it, so you have got to persuade those people you care about. Once or twice if you fail in this endeavour to bring people about to view things through your perspective, do not worry because you can do five other things to make them happy for every one thing that has annoyed them as long as it is not seriously affecting anyone.
12. Stick to your decision:
Having a strong will is just as crucial as having a strong mind once you have taken a decision because it is not unnatural for a person to be bugged by his own tendencies to falter from what he thought would be best for him while taking a decision. Many people lose their confidence over having taken a decision they were unsure about. This can be avoided plainly by developing a resolute mind owing to several useful techniques. One of the most effective methods to achieve this kind of mental stability is to meditate. There are diverse forms of meditation which always serve the unified purpose of calming one’s mind.
13. Do not tolerate condescension:
As mentioned earlier how talking to too many people regarding decisions is most likely to add to your tension and create problems that were not even there in the first place. On top of it all it can foster a sense of inferiority in your mind if your so-called soothsayers are adding to your vulnerability rather than reducing it. Moreover, a psychological study proves that cynical thinking can indirectly trigger the number of negative possibilities as ruminating too much will only make you nervous and can only lead you to disappointment.
14. Do not stress out and keep calm:
Lastly, try not to stress out no matter what you are dealing with. Although it is easier to say, we often fall in situations where we completely lose our mind as to make a choice that is best for us. We have to try and keep our minds from being clogged by unnecessary thoughts. For example, if you have qualms about something at work or suppose someone at home has fallen terribly ill and needs immediate medical attention then do not breakdown in nervousness but keep calm, think your way through a solution and take actions accordingly.
What we often do not take into account when we are tensed with decisions is that our behaviour towards our near and dear ones changes and we tend to unintentionally hurt them as long as we are passing through our rough patch. This can easily be taken care of if we do not lose our mind over tiny things, although it is normal to be having mood swings when you are torn between tough decisions or hard decisions for yourself. What needs to be kept in mind is that your decision may not have an instantly positive impact on your life but will eventually take a better turn since it is a mark of maturity to take decisions beneficial in the long run rather than keeping your eyes on the immediate prize.
