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Funny Office Rules and Regulations that Companies Enforce

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“Reaching the office on time, working hell hard and then leaving home”. This becomes the life of most of us after we live to make it big in our 9 to 5 job. But putting up 100% effort also cannot guarantee success. You will be told many success mantras which will stimulate your mind, but when you try to follow those it feels outlandish while correlating those to your work life.

Funny Office Rules

Therefore, let’s start with the basics and work on some rules which can make a good impression on you in the workplace. Enough of being a hard worker, it is time to be a smart worker as well, below are some of the funny rules and regulation following which you may change the way people think about you. These are just from the perspective of how people generally think and how to be witty in using that general thinking on a lighter note.

Funny Office Rules:

1. Look as if you are under work pressure, irritated and annoyed:

Can you fake being anxious about the work? Then you may be successful to portray that you are a hard worker to your colleagues and management. Remember one thing that you have to look irritated and annoyed, but you don’t have to behave like one because if your behavior is annoying you may upset people around you. When you carry that look your boss feels you are in the middle of your work and engrossed very much into it.

2. Big ‘no’ to casual walking:

Do not be a happy go lucky kind of person while you surf through the office. You may be moving around for work itself, but your careless footsteps may be judged as if you are wasting your time by moving around in the office or just took a break to fag. However, when you seriously put each footstep calculating your move, it can be interpreted as if you are going for a business meeting or some very important work and even an often walk to washroom would not be minded.

3. Bid adieu to the neat freak you and keep your desk cluttered:

Sometimes showing how organized you are, can counter your impression. Workstation full of files and other official documents may look bizarre, but the reality is that confusion and bizarre are deemed as the bi-products which arise due to work overload. Thus, a messy desk means that you are rigorously working towards the project assigned to you.

4. Type on your computer whenever somebody moves around you:

This is actually like the halo effect which most of the advertisements create for the customers and clients. So when you are busy working or researching on your computer screens, just try to rapidly type something on your keyboard as soon as you see somebody is approaching. Working without typing is not as impactful as when you type. Our brain has been tamed in such a way from the very start that we believe work is happening only when some physical activity is involved.

5. Carry the files, printouts or other official documents around your workplace:

The work is simple; engage yourself in some work which needs you to carry the files and other documents from one place to another within the office. You may just refresh the old records or just act like you are doing one but just make sure that you keep an irritated look when you carry the documents otherwise your colleagues may catch you pretending.

6. Always meet your boss with a smile:

The smile which is a simple gesture of happiness and joy can be a great way to keep your boss positive about you. You may not like your boss much, but faking a smile may be intercepted by your boss that how much you love being the part of the organization. Your smile may also indicate your boss that you are confident, meticulous and able to challenge any obstacle coming your way on the job. Additionally, the smile has a contagious effect, so you may get a smile in return which can raise your rapport among your colleagues.

7. Send Emails in the odd hours:

Imagine receiving an official email at around 2 am at night from a colleague. You would obviously think that how consciously your colleague is involved in the job and work that even after going home he is working on it exhausting himself till late hours. So you have to do the same, but don’t send any vague email it should be regarding work or project you are involved in. Just set an alarm and then send the email at the unearthly hours and leave everyone, including your boss just wondering about your hard work.

8. Never miss offering tea/coffee to your boss:

Never forget to offer your boss the beverages which you opt for yourself during your office hours. Not only it shows your etiquettes but also your dedication to working with him. Tea/coffee which seems like the savior to you during your office time has the same effect on your boss so it can reflect your compassion for your boss and you will never go unnoticed.

9. Use the Jargons:

“Don’t reinvent the wheels”, “face time”, “low hanging fruit”, “touch base”, “bang for the buck”, there are many jargons which may seem alien terms to you but it can have a very positive effect when you use them in your interactions. Use of jargons and familiarity to them comes with experience, but this e-age, you cannot leave everything on experience. However, you hate them, but learning them and using them in your presentations and other official conversations can make everybody think that you have an adept knowledge about the business world.

10. Do not leave office on time:

As the clock strikes five or the ending hour of your work timings, most of us are tempted to leave this corporate jungle instantly. But control your temptations as it may spoil your hard earned good image in the office. You are always expected to come office minutes earlier, but never expected to leave even minutes after and if you do that you will be considered apathetic towards your workplace. So you may sit and browse something of your interest or on social media websites but always leave the office late.

After reading all these points, now you must have realized why even being so hard working, you are never noticed. In every organization, one thing is ubiquitous, “Out of sight, out of mind”. So focus your work in a way that you are always in the picture. Then you start working forth for the hike, promotion or maybe becoming the perfect employee. In this quest for success, you unknowingly make some silly mistakes that never let you climb the rope. Therefore, after building a good impression, make it a rule to avoid these mistakes at work which you may smile reading.

Messing up at Work – How to Avoid?

2. The first thing you do after coming to office is checking your mails:

Most of the employees make this mistake and even think themselves to be very professional and dedicated. Checking emails is a good practice, but that should put second in priority as soon as you reach the office. The reason behind this logic is that when we open our mailbox and find so many pending emails to be responded back, we are taken over by stress which hampers our productivity for the day thereafter.

3. You write long emails:

Well, you may feel that giving a detailed answer to an email is a good practice which reflects your knack of knowledge but it is the other way round. Whenever you write an email, make it crisp, to the point and yet impressive. Check the email of successful people around you, the mail responses and even the new mail will always be short and restricted to five sentences. Actually, longer the email, more are the chances of it being avoided. In today’s era everyone is busy so it would be more than great if you can say your point in few words but in a polite manner.

4. The whole day you sit at your desk and work:

You may think what is wrong in that, obviously, you are paid to work. The point here is instead of sitting and working, try standing and working. As per a study was done by the Olin Business School (Washington University) when you stand and work in a group project you tend to be more creative, more zealous and more open to every members’ idea rather than being defensive about your own. Standing for a while is not a painstaking task if it can add so many positives about you.

5. You try to multitask most of the time:

In pursuit to do more in less time, the common mistake done every day of all is multitasking. So it is quite possible that you may be responding the emails, talking on your phone and having your lunch, altogether. This makes you an average performer in your office. For thinking an out of the box idea or doing a work more impressively you need to focus on them singularly.

6. Awful! You are missing the happy moments:

With so much of stress budding in every hour, there has to be a break in between your office timing. Office hours are hectic, but taking a break in between can make you more productive in the second half in lieu of being exhausted and less productive. This is the reason that companies like Google and Facebook are inducing their employees to take a 20 minute nap in between. You may not be allowed to take a nap in your office, but at least you can calm down for a while and just have a cup of coffee.

7. You are not taking any leaves for going on vacation:

“All work and no play make jack a dull boy”, a very famous old saying which is true till date. When all you do is work, your creativity automatically subsides. Going on vacation is the best way to invigorate you. While traveling you have many opportunities to know the height of your capacities. New ideas come from new experiences so unless you pack your bags and set on a trip you cannot get one. The ultimate happiness of meeting your loved ones living in some distant city or going wild to explore nature is all unmatchable and you must engage yourself into it to revive yourselves from within.

8. You become the victim of success:

Any promotion or salary hike is in vain if you just burn yourselves in the flames of success and sacrifice your health and your sleep for that. It may look fruitful in the short run, but in the long run, you are ruining yourselves. Don’t get too inspired by the motivational stories told by your managers, they are told to keep your spirits high but not on the cost of your health.

Summing up, there are some people who always seek an opportunity to get ahead, some people who only work for the monthly paychecks and there are some people who work to outdo. Who you are, can be rightly decided by you only, but if you are the one willing to outdo, treading on the heels of the tactics mentioned before and working in the light of improving mistakes mentioned thereafter, can make the goals easily achievable.